Carrying on from last week’s 42 Lessons From 42 Years (part 1), here’s part 2. Since I didn’t want to make a monster of a blog post, I thought I’d break it into 3 parts. I’m sure you will all be sick of me by the 3rd one 🙂 If you missed it, here’s part 1.

Enjoy The Journey

We can all get caught up in a race to the end. But the end of what? Well, everything. Take a few moments to enjoy the journey, not just the result at the end. As writers, make sure you cherish the good and bad moments of the writing process, not just the completion of the manuscript and subsequent book launch. For each moment of the journey, whether you are learning a skill, working on a project or going on an actual journey – find fun in the doing not just the completion.

“Someday” Isn’t Real

It is so easy to just say “Someday, I’ll (insert task etc.)” The problem is, “someday” is elusive and it gets away from us. Yes, we might not have the time, the money or the energy. But by relegating those things to someday, you are almost surely stamping it with “not going to do it ever.”

Some things are just fun things to daydream about and we never really considered we would do it – but other things, if we want them, we should consider how we might manage them. Even just adding a deadline date like “by the time I’m (insert an age) I’ll (insert that task).” You might find you are more likely to find a way to do it.

Remember To Look Inward

The world is a noisy place, even more so with the internet. No longer are we restricted to the people we see in our lives or what we read in newspapers. We can see so much, hear so much and everyone wants to tell you something.

But in a world of extreme external stimuli, it is important to find time to look inward, to consider your own well-being and worth rather than always looking outward. (remember, balance is the key, a little bit of both is needed).

Learn To Adapt

The term “Survival of the Fittest” refers, in part, to the most adaptable to manage in their environment.  Many of us don’t like change, this is especially the case for those with conditions such as anxiety, ADHD and autism to name a few.

But in truth, change is important, and adapting and learning are important. So take the time to consider what you can do to adapt as things change. Yes, it can be tough, but it doesn’t mean it’s not worth doing.

Make Your Own Path

With connections to millions of people around the world, thousands of people who do what you do – such as other writers, it can be easy to get swept away considering what “others are doing”. But make sure you make your own path, I say make your own path not walk your own path because sometimes you have to carve that path out first.

It’s not just in schools where peer pressure comes into play, expectations and pressure can happen at any time in our lives. People judge, it’s a human thing and it can mean making your own path is hard… but do it anyway.

Find The Good

We all have bad days, where something just happens and derails us. These bad moments are great at picking up speed so one bad thing seems to encourage another. Try and step out of the moment and look for the positive.

Your Reaction Will Define Your Day

This ties into the above, don’t let a bad or low mood taint the whole day. Where possible, try and catch yourself when you feel the mood fall. Take a breath and try not to hold onto the anger, upset or frustration.

Do something intentionally to help alleviate the mood. If you let something bad affect your mood and then carry that mood with you, it will leak out into everything you touch and even to the people around you.

Don’t Quit, Pivot!

We all want to quit things sometimes, and there’s nothing wrong with quitting (sometimes) but instead of just quitting, think about why you can’t do it, are struggling and consider if there is some way you can “pivot”.

Want to get healthy but don’t enjoy the gym? Don’t just quit, consider pivoting to something that might make it easier to go to – like a dance class or a walking club. Struggling to write a novel? Try a novella or short story instead.

We can get very narrow-focused with some things and if we can’t manage Y then we just stop, but maybe instead of Y, we try Z.

Beware Of Clutter

As a former hoarder, I can say that clutter is something that you need to get a handle on as soon as you can.  With the rise of maximalism and things like Wish and Temu where people rush to buy cheap, often badly made items… because they are cheap or come with a free item, I say be aware of the clutter.

It takes up more than just physical space. There is a mental cost to clutter and it’s not something you realise straightaway. Collect Memories, Not Things.

Treat Your Body Well

You really don’t realise how fast time goes and how things you took for granted change. I am now in my fourth decade and I was shocked at how quickly my health deteriorated when I stopped my daily walks.

I knew I wasn’t going to stay as fit as I was in my 20s (especially since I stopped being as active) but sometimes knowing something doesn’t mean you will actually do something. But when I was given the chance to join a gym referral programme I took it. I am already feeling the benefits and want to make sure I don’t let it slide.

Own Your Reactions

For someone with moderate anxiety (used to be severe but I’ve worked hard to deal with it better), I don’t always react well in certain situations and have lashed out verbally at people dear to me. I apologise but I have worked to be better with my reactions (where possible).

Because in the end, my anxiety is an explanation for my behaviour it is NOT an excuse and I need to work on making sure my reactions and behaviours (that I can gain some control of) are worked on.

*Not all conditions are workable, for example, dementia etc so this point does not represent those.

Time Passes Fast

When I was younger, I remember family members and neighbours telling me that time goes fast, especially as you get older and like almost every teenager in the history of time, I completely ignored that. 

So now I am here, completely aware that those people were so right and that I wish I had listened more – though I think that is part of being a teenager. 🙂 But time does go fast, so try and do what you love, make connections, be brave, and don’t let too much linger under “someday”.

Unplug

Make sure you take some time to unplug. Unplug from your phone so you aren’t “on call” to everyone who wants your attention. Unplug from your computer so that you can’t drawn into rabbit holes of pages and videos. Unplug from the TV and the constant search for what to watch next.

Not all the time, there’s a lot all those things are great for and I would not want to get rid of my TV or my computer (my phone… that’s a different matter). But every now and then, remove the stimuli, let your brain rest and reset. Once a week, once a month… something, just unplug.

Stop Comparing

We can’t really help it, we compare ourselves to our peers, to our authority figures, to the celebrity that is the newest big name, we compare our work, our processes, our output… but comparing can cause issues. It can stop you from developing your own sense of style and voice. It can swell self-doubt and reduce self-esteem. We can get hyper-focused on what other people are doing and how they do it.

But we are all different, we all do things in a different way. Our brains work differently, our experiences are different – even things that are similar, there are still differences. So when you realise you are in a loop of comparing, make a conscious effort to shut it down.

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Thanks for taking the time to read this. There’s only one more after this, I promise 🙂

Read Part 1

Read Part 3 (out on 13th October)

Happy writing & stay safe

I write articles on writing, marketing, blogging, organising, social media, books and some random stuff.  I also create free printable resources.  If you find my content helpful and entertaining, consider supporting me on ko-fi (where you will also find extra content I post).  All donations go to keeping my website running and helping me move towards publishing my novels.