Today’s blog post is a little different, I’m analysing a specific habit I have. Maybe you have it too! And it’s all about emails! Well, that and other forms of digital communications.
Trapped In A Cycle
Let me ask you a question: How often do you sign in to your email inbox, stare at the amount of emails then sign out without even dealing with any of them?
Now me, I do that a lot. Way more than I even realised. This is compounded as I have more than one email address (I have a business email address, an “official” email address for things pertaining to me real name (Ari Meghlen is a pen name!) and then my Ari Meghlen email address).
The problem is, I live within cycles, bad cycles, desctructive cycles and it’s very hard to get out of them.
Anxiety is part of my life and while I manage it pretty well these days, there are certain aspects where it holds more control. Emails is one, well, messages in general.
All I have to do is have a few busy days, miss replying to emails, text messages, blog comments, social media DMs and the cycle begins.
I see the messages building up, get paralysed due to the quantity, log off and ignore them. Pretty useless really as all this does it make more build up.
You see, there are emails and messages I have to reply to – ones that must be dealt with instantly – these are usually business ones, customer ones but also specific ones regarding the house whether that’s issues with insurance or requests for payment following work etc. Honestly, just these types of messages can take all my time and emotional energy.
Anxiety Hates Messages
It took me a while to realise that too many messages can be overwhelming. So I spent some time in my inboxes, removing myself from old mailing lists, changing my notifications from companies so I am not inundated with a dozen emails telling me they have my order, they are shipping my order, the order is in transit, the order has been delivered and finally how did we do with the delivery?
However, some notifications you just can’t change and others even when you unsubcribe, they can either not remove you or it takes ages and you have to give it time before you change again!
I am currently in one of those cycles. I managed to catch back up with the comments I actually enjoy getting, such as blog comments and WhatsApp messages from friends. Social media comments are harder for me to reply too, it’s one of the reasons I’ve been avoiding Twitter for months!
It makes me sad, after all I get overwhelmed just looking at them, not the messages themselves, I love getting messages – that someone took the time to reply, to email me, to leave their thoughts and reach out. It means a lot – but the cycle spins me around.
If you ever wonder why I don’t answer messages fast, how I can go days, weeks and even months before I reply – it’s my brain. It’s trapped in a cycle and I have to take some time to break myself out of it.
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