Writers, please stop all the hating

So, I’m seeing a lot of negativity from some writers.  Since creative people are tangled in a vast swathe of emotions and sensations, negativity is certainly an understandable part of the tapestry.  We know self-loathing can often rise in Creatives.  However this negativity is directed outwards.

stop all the hate

This negativity is aimed at other people, mostly other writers, reviewers and even readers.

Hate for other writers

There are too many writers who see other writers are competition.  They are the enemy, they are the people they measure themselves against and if they come up wanting, well, that negativity just festers.

The thing is other writers are not our competition.  We should not measure ourselves against them. (Unless you do that to strive to be better, to see a certain level of authorship that you want to achieve).

However if that measuring stick leaves you bitter and resentful, then that stick is probably up your ass and you need to deal with it.

But if you are treating other writers are competition, someone to win against then you’ve already lost (I know, so cliche, but it works).

The only writer you measure yourself against is YOU.  What you wrote 10 years ago, what you wrote 10 days ago, what you wrote yesterday.  You compete with yourself in order to get better.

Also, if you are spewing nasty about other writers, in a hope of damaging their career – well, all I have to say is maybe you should spend more time focused on your OWN career and then you wouldn’t be so bitter.

Hate for reviewers

These people get a lot of stick.  It’s not an easy job to review someone’s work and if you asked for that review, then you need to accept it might not swing in your favour.  Yup that will sting but guess what?  You need to deal with it.

Toughen up and understand that there will be other people who won’t like your work. People you didn’t ask to review, who instead bought your book and then felt the desire to review it.

If you lose your shit at these people, you’re only hurting yourself.  It makes you look weak if you lash out at a reviewer.

IF you asked for a review and someone kindly gave their time to read your work and leave an honest review, then accept it – gracefully, professionally.

However, I’ve have people just ask me to read and review their work.  I’m not even a reviewer anymore, though I do leave the odd review of books I’ve read.  But the people who have approached me, often haven’t even bothered to learn what I like to read.

Already they are risking an issue by pitching their book to the wrong audience.  So while you cannot guarantee a reviewer will like your work – at least make sure you target reviewers who read the genre you write and are the correct target demographic.

Good tips for working with reviewers can be found in the two guest post articles Book Reviewing by my friend C and Do’s and Don’ts for connecting with reviewers by Erika.

Hate for the readers

This one is just plain weird.

The idea that there are people who are buying your book, reading your book and if they say one thing you don’t like, you snap at them.  Yes it’s sometimes done, though thankfully I’ve not heard about it much.

Readers are your customers.  They can choose to read what they want, they can recommend things to friends, they can blog about their book choices and create instagram challenges.

They DON’T all have to like your book.  They may comment to a friend that they didn’t like your book.  If that happens, take a breath, scream into a pillow if you need it then just let it go.

Creativity is subjective.  I’m not a fan of Harry Potter or Stephen King.  Does that diminish them?  No, they have people who love their work and what is my opinion?  It’s just that, an opinion.

Don’t worry about people hating your book, if you have worked hard on it, edited it, professionally edited it, and done everything you could to make it the best it can be.  Then be happy with it and there will be readers who love it.

Teamwork concept. People hands pulling the rope on grey background

Enjoy the fact that people will like your work.  Accept that there will be people who won’t like your work. Don’t snap, flame or bitch at people who don’t like your work.

Treat writing as a profession and be professional.

~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~

Well, for those of you keeping track you will have noticed I missed writing the Wednesday Fiction Blog Hop post… yes, that was due to working overtime and coming home with a headache.

New guest post will be up next Tuesday and I have several more awesome guest posters lined up too!

Happy writing
 
Ari

 

 

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27 thoughts on “Writers, please stop all the hating

    • 😀 Thanks for the comment, I am glad you liked the post. I’ve never been on LinkedIn but several of my friends have said it can get pretty heated over there. I’m not sure when it became popular to put others down and lash out constantly. Writers should unite! We should be supporting and compassionate to our fellow writers. We should celebrate their successes not lash out with petty jealousies. (Maybe I’m hoping for too much, but I will continue to hope)

  1. As a new author, I want a truly honest review. How else can I improve my work. To snap at the reviewer is like snapping at your editor. Stupid, to say the least. Author’s need to listen to both their editors and their reviewers and make their work better. Simple. Straight forward. Basic.

    • Thanks for your comment, yes, it seems so counterproductive to lash out at the very people who are there to read your work and help you. I’ve seen people complain about getting 4 stars. I mean 4 stars is a positive review!! It seems some authors don’t realise that their petty behaviour will only hurt themselves

  2. Thank you! Having been on the receiving end of some very strange minded authors this advice is really good and important to share. Of course I’ve had a few attacks from authors about my reviews, though they were positive I still got yelled at but to be nasty and weird towards your readers!? It does seem very bizarre but petty behaviour of hating the very people who read your work is like a nurse trying to make her patients ill, it makes no sense! I’m going to share this post, it’s very important authors know this, thank you for writing it 🙂 ❤

    • Thanks C, I appreciate that. Yes it definitely needs to be shared. Hopefully some of the people who react badly, act petty may eventually realise they are only hurting themselves.

      • I do hope so :). It doesn’t only look bad for the person they lose their cool with but others pick up on that behaviour or hear about it through other authors/reviewers/readers talking so it really isn’t a good idea to get a sort of bad reputation like that.

  3. It’s stuff like this that has made me so leery of being on so many social networking sites, and leery of everything I post. It’s so easy for one person who takes something wrong, or badly, and then gets venomous over it to send someone else’s career up in flames. :-\

    • Yes, it does make it difficult. We have to remember that there are many more supportive, awesome people than the morons that troll and flame after overreacting.

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